Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Intervention

Reality has mauled me in the face.  It's kinda like getting hit in the face by a truck. 

See I have a college degree now, since last August.  I try not to put too much personal information in this but I have a job interview tomorrow FOR A REAL JOB.  I'm too excited. 

I don't know how much it pays but I hope it's enough for me to quit dancing. 

I can't be working at the club one night and all of a sudden someone in management sees me on stage.  I wouldn't even have to see him for my career to be over. 

I danced my way through college, just like that tale you hear about some girls.  Well, I'm one of them and I can't be the only one.  So now that I'm done with college, it's time to make some money with what I learned. 

I'm scared shitless but I'm just going to have to put my game on.  I've never had a job interview like this before and the lack of experience is driving me nuts.  I just need to remember that I am qualified for this job.  Degree, internship, I never gave up. 

But giving up stripping.   Oh, it's gonna hurt.  >.<

:(

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Half empty or half full?

I've been sitting here trying to think of what stood out to me... oh.

The fact that I made half as much as I made last night.  That kind of sucks.  I guess I brought it upon myself.  I made mistakes tonight.  I wasted a lot of time.  Many customers weren't tipping and I didn't feel like beating it out of them. 

It just sucks to make half as much because when I think of it, I got shot down twice as much.  I got too many no's.  Stupid Saturday night.  I expected to do better tonight. 

A particular regular customer has lost interest in me and is now giving money to Whoreface, one of my co-workers.  I don't know why I call her that... I just don't like her.  I'm jealous, that's what it is.  I don't know the girl, but she's just better than me in ways I wish I was better.  I'm just pissed I haven't risen to her level yet.  I know she makes more money than me.  She has better game.  I want better game.

Perhaps it's the player - me.  I think I just played a piss poor game tonight, unlike last night.  I shouldn't have spent the most amount of time with the guys that paid the least.  Bad move. 

Guess I'll just have to do better next time.