Quality over quantity

I'm talking about customers.  Tonight probably would have sucked like all the other nights if I didn't catch those big fishes.

Lucky me.  Some of the girls who always seem to do well had shitty nights.  Crazy.  There were a lot of worthless lookie-loos, though.  That may have been it.  I was spinning in circles looking for my big fish for a while, too.

I'm also lucky I didn't have anything traumatic happen to me.  One guy wanted the cheap price and I could tell he wanted to treat me like a piece of meat, so I raised, and he declined, so I declined.  I guess I'm a bad stripper for saying no?

I feel like my hustler balls dropped a little there.  They would've dropped more if I had convinced him to pay, but he was most definitely not sold.  Whatever, time to move on.

One guy really wanted to make me come three times, and it's like, why?  No one is allowed to finger me or do any of that shit, so it really seems pointless to get the hopes up for it.  All I wanted to say was, "shut the fuck up, loser, it's not happening."

But what I really said was, "You know what would make me cum?  If you paid me three times."

But apparently that was too difficult on his end, of course.  Stupid pervert.

I'm pretty pleased with how tonight turned out.  It was better than I expected.  Let's hope tomorrow turns out to be great, too.

Month of hell

I used to call every super busy month that.  I think I'm due for a month of hell.  I haven't done shit lately.

When I began college, November was the month of hell for the fall semester and April was the month of hell for spring, and July for the summer.

Well, July is coming up but I'm not in school.  I'm not expecting July to be a month of hell as far as stripping goes.  You would think July qualifies, but August makes July look like an easy month.  August is the real month of hell for strippers.

I have never had so many bad nights til August, unless you count last February.  That was a really disappointing month for me.  Then March came around and I completely forgot how shitty February was.  September was a lot better than August, too.

I need to make a new plan.  I feel so lost for what I'm supposed to do until school begins.  I have exactly two months.  I have a vacation planned, but I have GOT to save up some cash.  I don't want to borrow if I can avoid it.  I probably will, but it's not gonna be a colossal amount like I used to borrow.  Interest is so fucking ugly.

So I should work more.  During the summer.  It seems so backwards, because the summer is slow, so my motivation to go to work is low.  Working during the week during the summer feels like such a waste of time.  I look at all the days I worked during the week during the summer, and every night I made below average.  Ugh.  All the girls at work have been complaining, too.  I just don't want to subject myself to that kind of misery.  That's how bitches get burned out.

But contrary to how shitty it may be, I must suck it up and just go to work.  It only takes one customer to turn a bad night into a good one.  I can't miss out on those opportunities just because the odds of getting one are a lot lower.  At least I'm not playing poker for a living.  Bad nights for poker players include losing ALL of their cash they took three nights to make.

I have exactly nine weekends until school begins.  One of them is for vacation, so I really have eight work weekends.  I used to do so well with the Thurs-Fri-Sat stretch.  I think I'm gonna have to throw in Thursday nights, even though they SUCK.  Even a little money is better than none.  I might be miserable, but I won't be broke AND miserable.  Besides, it's the summer.  I will NEED to work extra just to keep up with bills.

So send me some motivation, willpower, stamina, and most importantly, a good work ethic.  

Why I keep crawling back

Money.  That's why I keep coming back.  That has never changed.  I'll tell you what else hasn't changed.  Summer being poop for money.

Tonight we had a super moon, the summer moon.  It was a late night for me.  The sun was up before 6 a.m.  It's definitely summer.  I can thank regulars for god tonight.  Club regulars.  I have no personal regulars, which is sad.  It's only because I work in a highly competitive club.  I'm sure if I worked somewhere more regulars based, I'd have a few good men coming to see me every week or two.

Usually whenever there is a full moon, I expect chaos, and a lot of bull shit.  But sometimes, good money flows with the full moon.  Not so much tonight.  So many guys, so many rejections.  Fine, I don't wanna dance for you anyway!

I didn't get much rest last night.  I was not firing on all cylinders.  I felt like my game sucked, I felt fat, not interested.  I kept trying to correct my body language since I am supposed to be dominant, confident and irresistible.  But I was so tired, turned off, and pissed off.  Not good.

I'm still a little bitter from last night.  I am so happy I'm done working this weekend.  Back to soul repair.

Get me out of here!

Tonight sucked.

Let me explain.

It's the first official day of summer.  So even though it was Friday night, Fridays have been great at sucking, especially during the summer.

Fuck summer.  And fuck these douche bags that try to fucking test me.  The night was already going really slow, and I hadn't caught a sale in a while.  When some guy finally said yes, I sat him down and got to the dance.

"This is my first time in a strip club," the douche bag said.

I don't care.  In my opinion, this means trouble, or it's really true.  But either way, I've gotten so much bullshit from dudes that have mentioned that before a dance.

"Is this your first dance, too?" I asked.

"No, I got one from this other girl, but you're way hotter."

Gee, thanks.

"She went over a few rules, no touching in certain areas and no licking, right?"

"That's right.  No touching my pussy and no reaching into my grand canyon."

Probably a minute into the dance, everything seems fine until I get my hand wet and sticky from touching the side of my boob.

"EW, what is this?  What did you do?!"

"It's just a little spit, the other girl said it was okay."

OH MY FUCKING GOD WHAT ON EARTH MAKES YOU THINK THIS IS OKAY YOU FUCKING PIG?!

"No, that is not okay, that is gross, give me my money."

I could've took the cash up front.  I didn't.  I'm so fucking stupid for that.  So all I got was $20 since I ended the dance early.

I didn't bother haggling since before he said he would pay $25.  Fucking douche bag.

One more post to add to the reasons why I need to fucking quit this job.  I hate being treated this way.  I really try not to get emotional, but this really upset me.

Just for you, daddy.

Happy Father's Day, dads.

I committed another cardinal stripper sin: I slept through Saturday night's shift.

"Okay, but you're gonna be bitching about money," my roommate said as I went to my room to take a "power nap."

These power naps are supposed to be about 30 minutes.  Last night my power nap lasted 11 hours.

So I traded a potentially awesome Saturday for a few hours of shut-eye.  And my body feels fantastic.

I at least worked on Friday night for a short period of time.  I'm still wired to the day clock so I started yawning all over my customers around 1:30, and the money pretty much stopped flowing.  I took that as a sign to leave.

So I worked like 4 hours this week.  Yes, call me a lazy piece of shit.  I deserve it.  I'm so broke.  I should just do the unthinkable and work tonight from 8-midnight.  I keep hearing about this shift and I just want to test it one day.  Tonight might be the night.  I could also talk myself out of it just as easily.

We'll see.  I'm due for some interesting stripper stories anyway.  This blog sucks right now.

Mouth health

I saw the dentist earlier today.  Overall, my mouth is in good health.  The hygienist told me I had lovely teeth and I'll have lovely teeth when I'm old only if I keep up on the maintenance, which includes flossing once every 24 hours.

I suck at remembering to floss.  Ugh, it's so tedious.  But so necessary.   Whenever I get around to it, after I finish, I tell myself I should be doing it every day.

And as a stripper, it's important to have good mouth health.  Customers are often close enough to be able to smell my breath, so brushing teeth before work is in the "getting ready" routine.  I might as well add flossing to the mix.  

The dentist also asked me what was going on with my life.  I couldn't say much, honestly.  I guess I am kind of boring lately, in case you noticed my lack of activity.  I'm just in a big waiting phase, waiting for my school life to come back, getting lots of sleep and trying to mentally prepare myself for the busy life ahead. 

I'm thinking these are the right decisions to make.  I've gotta fix my life on paper, and I still need to make money.  I'm trying to keep that perfect balance.  It's tough.  I have to constantly work at it.  I guess that's life.  I'm resting, but hardly.

Shift work sleep disorder

It's not exactly insomnia, which is the condition for people with normal working hours that can't sleep.

Shift work sleep disorder is the sleeping disorder people get when they work kooky hours like me.  I think I might be suffering from this.  At least my money is suffering.

I missed a Friday night because I felt like passing out right when I was supposed to go to work, around 9:30 p.m.  The thing is, I like to get my sleep between 7 a.m. to 3 p.m.  But many times, I stay up past 7 a.m.  The worst thing about staying up past 7 is that I can't go back to sleep and I end up staying awake well into the morning, sometimes the afternoon.  Once I pass out around noon, I don't wake up until its dark outside, which makes me feel backwards as a human.  So I try to reverse this problem by napping at night, but that only led to me waking up too early to stay up late at night, where I'm at right now.

I guess most people would be happy to be naturally waking up at 5:30 a.m.  Not me.  Ugh, there is nothing to do at this hour.  I'm usually unwinding, getting home from work, not just getting started.

I'm gonna take this event as a wake-up call (ha, get it?) to go see a doctor.  Maybe a little ambien after 7 could help me stop staying awake into the morning hours.  I really don't want to become dependent on drugs, though.  Hopefully I can quit stripping before this sleep cycle ruins me for life.